PLUS MINUS WHAT...!

Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Love Marriage or Arrange Marriage: what is right?


This is an article which is argument on the ever burning topic of Love Marriage or Arrange Marriage…


Marriage is an association of a male and a female to lead a new life living under one roof and reproduce the future generations. It is a most important aspect of a civilized society which has been changing with the span of time. It is not the education which is changing the meaning of marriage but it is the perception or rather unnecessary freedom which is being provided to the children and thus the whole institution of marriage is changing vigorously.
Marriage has been the most celebrated occasion of the society where in many of the friends and relatives are called in and the enjoyment is on the threshold for all. The marriage is not only a union of a male and female but it is also an association of the two families to which these two belong.
Marriage has an important meaning in the civilized society and this is the only reason which permits a young male and female to live under one roof on their own and above all the most important aspect of marriage is that they both are to share a same bed. To this concept of marriage George Bernard Shaw said, “Marriage is legal prostitution!” Many don’t agree with this statement but it is a fact which is legal in this changing society where now live in relationship is becoming a fashion.
Now this institution of marriage is losing its authenticity. The western world has entirely changed the meaning of the word marriage. In the western society marriage is synonym to legal sexual relationship. There marriage is solemnized when the couples have a child out of wedlock. The relation between a boy and a girl is free and all have sex before marriage. It was in the early 21st century when the mothers of the west used to take their daughters to doctors if they were not going on date. Now this culture is becoming a curse for the western world which is having huge number of illegitimate children. In London the population of the illegitimate children in on increase and the government is much concerned about it. In the western world, digamists are more to be found.
But on the other side of the globe i.e. India and the neighbouring countries of this rich cultured country, the system of marriage is considered to be holy even today in this changing world. Most of the marriages are conducted with the connivance of the parents. The bride or the bridegroom is selected by the parents and their decision is considered to be final. This system is termed as arrange marriage. The parents of the girl are in search of an eligible bachelor or the parents of the groom are in search of a suitable bride. This is a tedious process but it is part of the rich culture and the finally the marriage is solemnized with great dignity and gravity.
On the other hand there is an influential system of marriage which is coming into fashion i.e. love marriage. A girl and a boy select their life partner and marriage takes place without the approval of the parent of both the bride and the bridegroom in many cases. The marriage may be in the same caste or out of caste for the girl and the boy which is highly objectionable to the parents of both.
There are many problems in a love marriage in comparison to that in a arrange marriage. I am of the opinion that love is real only in marriage, before it is only infatuation or sexual attraction. The younger generations have been arguing that one should know their life partner before marriage and thus love is must before marriage. But the worst part of love marriage is that this has more number of divorces, if understanding was concrete then why there is increase in divorce cases in love marriages? This proves that one cannot understand everything about a person before the two are living together under one roof. One cannot know a person in and out till you are living with a person 24x7. And when after love marriage partners live together they get to know the reality of a person and thus they find that the things are not to their expectation. One can only love a person when you are living with a person and finally understand the person on the whole while facing the problems of life mutually.
Many argue that marriage is a compromise to which I don’t agree. If holiest thing on this planet Earth is defamed by the word compromise then one has not understood the meaning of word marriage. Marriage is one way of sacrifice wherein the female has to render in most of her and thus she should be respected for the same. She has to say farewell to her parental home and join a new family of the groom which is having all the new faces, culture, ideology, etc for her. The only person who is responsible for her wellbeing is the groom with whom she is tied in a nuptial knot. The groom as a good partner should make his other half–according to Hinduism wife is considered to be the other half of the husband–understand to the culture and the rituals of the new house to which she has joined in after marriage. Both the partners are concordant to each other and thus they are the one who should introduce the other to their families and the different cultures. Mostly the problem in the arrange marriage are least as mostly both the families are known to each other and there in not much about the changing culture or rituals. If the bride’s and the bridegroom’s are families are not known then it is the parents who play a bonding role and keep harmony in marriage. Marriage is conjugality union when both the partners are mature and believe in the institution of marriage on the whole.
Arrange marriage or Love marriage is a debate which is never ending but the sane brains have to find out the best of amongst both and educate the generation to the positive aspect of the one. No matter the votes of to the love marriage might be more, but here a couplet of Urdu is more appropriate:
Ab kahan pyar mein pakeezgi ka namo nihan;
Jism ki bhook hai aur iske siwa kuch bhi nahi.
Meaning: Pure or divine love is missing nowadays;
It is only physical attraction nothing beyond it.
Marriage is an institute which has two things which are the sole of it:
  1. Understanding
  2. Faithfulness
Both these feelings are must which is there in a love marriage before marriage and when actually marriage takes place the pan in not as hot as expected.
Whereas in arrange marriage these two things are developed post to wedlock and with span of time there is increase in the same.

This article is written for Sony TV's show 'LoveYa Arrange Marriage' contest on Indibloggers.
Visit http://www.facebook.com/LoveYaArrange.
Kindly refer Indiblogger for this contest.
Courtesy: Sony TV Shows - Tele-serial Picture.

32 comments:

  1. Very well written...but nowadays instead of taking tension is it love or arrange marriage bigger tensions has become what external factors will affect this marriage...financial factors most important then other family problems they all effect and make a marriage successful or unsuccessful...but problem is in Asia are we educating our children to compromise after marriages...? Are we telling our new generation that there will be problems in married life and you have to be patient to deal them...
    Western countries has started debating over live with marriage or without marriage we sould try not to start this debate in this part of world which is called third world or developing countries one of which is developing Giant lke India because it will finish our cultural values in entire region.

    ReplyDelete
  2. Τheгe is definаtely a gгeat ԁеal tο
    κnow abоut thiѕ tοpiс. I lіkе
    аll the points you mаԁе.

    Here іs my ωeb site: press release

    ReplyDelete
  3. Sweet blog! I found it while browsing on Yahoo News.
    Do you have any suggestions on how to get listed in Yahoo News?
    I've been trying for a while but I never seem to get there! Many thanks

    My website ... air max 95
    My webpage :: nike air max 2012

    ReplyDelete
  4. It's actually a great and useful piece of info. I am glad that you just shared this helpful information with us. Please stay us informed like this. Thanks for sharing.

    Feel free to visit my webpage - cheap nike air max 95

    ReplyDelete
  5. Nice post. I used to be checking continuously this weblog and I am inspired!

    Very useful information particularly the remaining part :)
    I take care of such info much. I used to be seeking this particular information for a long time.
    Thanks and good luck.

    my web blog; cheap nike air max 90
    Also see my website - cheap air max 2013

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hi there! Do you use Twitter? I'd like to follow you if that would be ok. I'm undoubtedly enjoying your blog and look forward to new updates.


    Feel free to surf to my weblog nike air max 2009
    my web site - cheap nike air max shoes

    ReplyDelete
  7. Unquestionably believe that which you stated. Your favorite reason appeared to be on the internet the simplest thing to
    be aware of. I say to you, I definitely get annoyed while people consider worries that they
    just don't know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top as well as defined out the whole thing without having side-effects , people can take a signal. Will likely be back to get more. Thanks

    Feel free to surf to my homepage ... gucci bags

    ReplyDelete
  8. Appreciate this post. Will try it out.

    My blog: cheap gucci bags

    ReplyDelete
  9. Hello there, I discovered your website via Google at the same
    time as looking for a related subject, your web site came up,
    it appears to be like great. I have bookmarked it in my google bookmarks.


    Hello there, simply was alert to your weblog via Google, and found that
    it's really informative. I'm going to be careful for brussels.
    I will appreciate when you continue this in future.

    Numerous other folks will be benefited from your writing.

    Cheers!

    my website :: nike air max 2012

    ReplyDelete
  10. Greetings! Very useful advice within this article!
    It is the little changes that will make the largest changes.
    Thanks a lot for sharing!

    Here is my weblog air max 2013

    ReplyDelete
  11. I have been browsing online more than 2 hours today, yet I never found any interesting article like yours.

    It is pretty worth enough for me. In my view, if all web owners and bloggers made
    good content as you did, the internet will be a lot more useful than ever
    before.

    Feel free to visit my web-site - nike air max 2012

    ReplyDelete
  12. Good answer back in return of this question with real arguments and describing all about that.


    Here is my website gucci bags on sale
    My web site :: gucci bags on sale

    ReplyDelete
  13. I just could not leave your website before suggesting that I extremely enjoyed the standard information a person
    provide for your visitors? Is going to be again continuously to
    inspect new posts

    My site louis vuitton official website

    ReplyDelete
  14. I was suggested this blog by my cousin. I am not sure whether this post is written by him as no one else know such detailed about my difficulty.

    You are wonderful! Thanks!

    Here is my blog post :: replica hermes
    Also see my webpage: replica hermes

    ReplyDelete
  15. As the admin of this website is working, no
    question very shortly it will be well-known, due
    to its quality contents.

    Here is my blog; michael kors bag

    ReplyDelete
  16. Write more, thats all I have to say. Literally, it seems as though you relied on the video to
    make your point. You obviously know what youre talking about, why waste your intelligence on just posting videos to your site when you could be giving us something informative to read?


    Here is my homepage :: fake louis vuitton handbags

    ReplyDelete
  17. I’m not that much of a internet reader to be honest but your blogs really nice, keep it up!
    I'll go ahead and bookmark your site to come back later on. Cheers

    My weblog: michael kors

    ReplyDelete
  18. Way cool! Some very valid points! I appreciate you writing
    this post and also the rest of the website is really good.


    Feel free to visit my website: Replica Louis Vuitton

    ReplyDelete
  19. Informative article, exactly what I needed.

    Feel free to surf to my blog nike free run

    ReplyDelete
  20. Everyone loves it whenever people get together and share
    views. Great site, continue the good work!

    Here is my weblog :: Replica Louis Vuitton
    My website: Replica Louis Vuitton

    ReplyDelete
  21. My partner and I stumbled over here different web address and thought I
    may as well check things out. I like what I see so i
    am just following you. Look forward to looking at your web page for a
    second time.

    my homepage - louis vuitton handbags outlet
    my page - louis vuitton outlet online

    ReplyDelete
  22. I am really loving the theme/design of your web site. Do you ever run into any internet browser
    compatibility issues? A small number of my blog readers have complained
    about my site not operating correctly in Explorer but looks great in
    Safari. Do you have any suggestions to help fix this problem?



    Also visit my site ... replica hermes birkin
    my web site: replica hermes

    ReplyDelete
  23. Hi everyone, it's my first go to see at this website, and paragraph is in fact fruitful designed for me, keep up posting these types of articles.

    My weblog; Michael Kors Factory Outlet

    ReplyDelete
  24. Excellent beat ! I would like to apprentice while you amend your site,
    how could i subscribe for a blog website? The account aided me a acceptable deal.

    I had been tiny bit acquainted of this your broadcast offered bright
    clear idea

    my web-site fake louis vuitton handbags

    ReplyDelete
  25. Good day! This post couldn't be written any better! Reading through this post reminds me of my old room mate! He always kept talking about this. I will forward this post to him. Pretty sure he will have a good read. Thanks for sharing!

    my blog :: christian louboutin replica

    ReplyDelete
  26. There's definately a great deal to learn about this subject. I love all the points you made.

    Also visit my web-site: michael kors jewelry collection
    my page > michael kors

    ReplyDelete
  27. I every time emailed this blog post page to all my associates,
    since if like to read it after that my links will too.


    my web-site - christian louboutin replica

    ReplyDelete
  28. Very good post. I will be going through many of these
    issues as well..

    Stop by my page: tv shows

    ReplyDelete
  29. Your mode of explaining all in this article is in fact nice, all can simply know it, Thanks a lot.



    Also visit my site Michael Kors Outlet Store

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hi every one, here every one is sharing these kinds of knowledge, thus it's fastidious to read this website, and I used to visit this web site everyday.

    Here is my homepage - Michael Kors Factory Outlet

    ReplyDelete
  31. Greetings, There's no doubt that your web site could be having internet browser compatibility issues. When I take a look at your blog in Safari, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping issues. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Besides that, wonderful blog!

    my page: www.toryburchoutletstore2013.com

    ReplyDelete
  32. The best part of this article that I really liked was that, Marriage is something that is considered "Holy" and why should something that is Holy should be a "compromise"...I totally agree that it should be something based on Understanding and faithfulness and not just Compromise,but one can't really say that majority Divorces take place in Love marriages only cos even arranged marriages end up with Divorce, one point could be that, it may be difficult to go for divorce if its arranged marriage cos the family or other relations are mostly involved in arranged marriages and for the sake of all those factors maybe its not easy to go for divorce. But in either case whether its love or arranged, the meaning and purpose of "Marriage" still remains the same.

    ReplyDelete